Saturday, July 30, 2011

tonight I did something I never do.

I took a bubble bath.  For two hours.

It was my first day of vacationing at the beach, and the tub in the bathroom attached to my room is spectacular, very deep and white with a big silver faucet.  It was heavenly.  The water was just the right temperature, and the bubbles were almond-scented and light.  And who doesn't feel quietly glamorous lounging under mounds of foam, hair in a bun, with the water loosing wispy curls at the nape of the neck?  It feels like being in 1960s photograph.

I haven't felt really, truly happy very much since losing my dad.  Mostly I feel like I'm wandering around in a haze, not really aware of my surroundings, floating along in the hopes that someone's going to shake me awake and tell me that of course everyone's okay, I was just having a bad dream.  But tonight, alternately reading one of my favorite magazines (thank you so much, Taryn! ♥♥♥) and blowing loose suds at my exposed knees, the heartbreak wasn't nearly gone, but I did at least feel closer to being aware of the present.

2 comments:

  1. Julie. That was beautiful. I know it has been an extraordinarlly difficult and sad time for you and your Mom. I'm glad you were able to escape, if only for a couple of hours. I'm sure it was very relaxing. But wasn't your body just a little wrinkly after two hours? LOL. Anyway, I just wanted to say hello and wish for you much peace. What beach are you visiting? I live just 90 minutes from the NC Outer Banks. Take care of yourself Julie. Write me occasionally and let me know how school and things are coming along. Email address is, tbtodd@gmail. Bye, Brent

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  2. Thank you so much for both the comment and compliments! I was in Brigantine, NJ, which was lovely. Hope you're having a fantastic summer!

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